Updated: Dec 24, 2018

When sexual assault, abuse or rape happens it’s common that women are made to think and feel like it’s our fault. We’re so conditioned to believe that. We’ve been taught this way since we were little. That’s why we don’t talk about it. Instead of the rapist being blamed for everything the survivor is shamed into thinking they’ve done wrong. “What were you wearing?” Being a common question asked. Our clothes do not determine our consent! Newsflash: clothes don’t cause rape, rapists do. Rape culture needs to end. Stop blaming the survivors.

When I first saw the Me Too movement I first thought “I’m glad nothing happened to me”. But things did happen to me. I buried them deep down and it breaks my heart that I’ve always thought it was my fault so I didn’t think much of it.

I thought it was my fault when I was repeatedly sexually harassed and prayed on by a man when I was a kid. I thought it was my fault when I was drugged in Indonesia. I had mild amnesia for weeks afterwards & I thought it was my fault. I thought it was my fault when I was raped by my good friends friend. It wasn’t until recently that I realised what happened was not my fault at all.

I’ve been wolf whistle at, cat called, groped, received unwelcome sexual advances and rape threats and I’ve been forcibly held against my will. This is sexual harassment & assault and it’s not okay. No woman should have to deal with this. No one should have to deal with this.

I had been reluctant to share this but I refuse to succumb to fear. I refuse to be silenced. I want to show women that you can speak up! It’s not too late to say something and it’s never too late to go to the authorities. It doesn’t matter how many years it’s been or if you don’t have anything physical to show for it. Your word is your proof. I hope this gives you the courage to speak up as well.

Remember, it’s not your fault. Rape/assault is never the survivors fault. You had the right to make your own choices and you are responsible for them but NO ONE has the right to abuse you.

© 2020 by Eloura Wild